Hello World,
My fourteen year-old daughter Heidi is an inspiration to me. She is moulding who I am as much as my mothering may influence her (if not more so). It is I who have followed her lead on becoming a vegetarian, in making fashion choices, in being more forgiving. She thinks deeply and spiritually. So, look out! She is going to change the world. In some ways she already has.
Heidi recently submitted an article to the Christian Science Publishing Society. Since they decided not to print it, I have her permission to post it here. Enjoy!
With love,
Maria
Pen One With Love, Despite Writer’s Block
by Heidi
I recently had an assignment to write an inspirational article. Two days before it was due, I had part of the article written, but my heart was not in the writing and the whole thing seemed extremely superficial. For days I had put off working on it, feeling a stubborn sense of writer’s block, and once or twice crying because I didn’t know how to make the article feel “real.” My mom finally said that if I didn’t finish the article, I couldn’t go to Six Flags with my friends the next day.
I was desperate for everything to work out, but I didn’t know what or how to do it. I wanted so badly for this article to be perfect, for people to see it and think, "Wow, that is really good." I wanted the others in the group to be impressed by me.
I was crying in confusion again about the article and what I was going to do--how it all had to be perfect. My mom had me call a Christian Science practitioner, and while she gave me some ideas and agreed to pray for me about the article, I hung up the phone feeling even more hopeless. Now there was yet another person I would disappoint if this wasn’t an amazing article.
At this point, I was quite hysterical. I sat in front of the blank computer screen screaming at God to help me. I was trying to calm myself, but I only felt helplessness. I kept yelling prayers that I have learned from Sunday School, but I have said them so many times that they felt almost meaningless.
I was shaking uncontrollably when my golden retriever, Bogie, walked in the door wagging his tail. I collapsed onto him, clinging onto his fur with all my might. For a few minutes I just sobbed into his warm coat, as he stood there patiently, with a calm peace almost uncharacteristic for him.
I felt God in Bogie just then. I felt that all really was well, and no matter what I wrote for the article it wouldn’t matter what people thought. "If Love is at all present, it is all that is present," is another thought that ran through my head, and I had to smile at how true that was. Bogie was expressing so much joy and comfort. I felt so much love and gratitude in that moment. Bogie knew that Love was here. It occurred to me that I could just love what I have to write, too.
I remembered a quick healing of food poisoning I had when the same practitioner asked me, “How do you feel about Bogie?” I had responded by telling her how much I loved him. She said something along the lines of, “So you feel good about him. If you can feel that goodness and you can feel that love for Bogie, then that is all you can feel and know in every other aspect of your life. God good does not pick and choose where goodness and love are going to be. The all-knowing only knows how to be All-in-all, not All-in-some (part of your life) or Part (of God) in-all. But All-in-all. Since there is only one measure of God, good.... and that is infinite, allness, if God is at all present in your life, He is all-present.” This thought came to my mind again as I buried my head in Bogie’s chest. I knew that God had a plan and it was going to work out.
A sudden wave of joy and peace came over me, and I started yelling again, only this time it was, “Thank you, thank you God.” I had an answer. It didn’t matter if I didn’t know what I was going to write just yet. Nothing had to be humanly perfect. I didn’t need to fear. God really did speak to me then. In that instant, I felt completely healed of any anxiety I had regarding the project, and of any sense of hysteria. Suddenly, I knew what I wanted to write about; I felt it and I loved it. Bogie licked me one more time, then walked out of the room, still wagging his tail. His work was done.
With that new sense of peace, gratitude and excitement that I had all I needed, that God really had spoken to me and it was not superficial in any way, I began to write. I felt God’s presence more than I had in a long, long time. When I was done with the article, I knew it was not perfect, but that was ok. The true thought behind it and the love I felt would show through, and that was all that mattered. I didn’t need to worry about being judged; I felt good about what God had led me to write, and so wonderfully at peace about the whole situation.
That love, peace, and inspiration from God and through Bogie has been such a blessing and turning point for me. Thank you Bogie, and thank you God.
Showing posts with label pets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pets. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
God's Plan Can't Be Stopped
Dear Friend,
I've been reminded this week that if something is right, nothing can stop it from happening. Likewise if something isn't right (if God has a better plan), God won't let us make a mistake.
Several years ago, we adopted two collies. Tamlin, was named for a mythical Scottish knight. His handsome black coat and doting manner matched his namesake. Pippi, is light brown and white with black highlights; she could audition for Lassie. Her perkiness matches Pippi Long Stocking, the storybook character for which she is named. We got the dogs from a breeder who lives 11 hours away; gratefully she agreed to drive and meet us part way with the dogs. She is a musician with a busy performance schedule, but we managed to find one day in December which would work for both of our calendars. The day before we were to leave to get the dogs, there was still a lot to do. We were having trouble finding two dog crates that would sit side by side in the back of our car for the dogs to travel in. My dear mom, who had an absolute faith in God to take care of every single one of life’s details, spent the day praying for our trip. Late that night she called to say she wasn’t feeling well and asked if I could come to her house. As I cared for her throughout the night, she assured me that she wanted us to proceed with plans to get the dogs and suggested several options for her care; however, as morning dawned she unexpectedly passed away. As I prayed about what to do, the thought came to me very clearly that “Mom would want us to go get the dogs.” At first this seemed impossible, but I remembered Mom’s prayers. Trusting God to guide us step by step, we were able to make the necessary immediate arrangements for Mom’s affairs, found crates that fit in the car , and left for our trip late in the afternoon. Welcoming the dogs to our family, loving them and helping them get settled, was the perfect balm for healing grief over Mom’s passing. God's timing was perfect--a precious reminder that nothing, not even death, can separate us from the love of God.
The following fall, our children decided it was time to have cats again too. I wasn’t too sure about the idea (especially their request for kittens), but I try never to make a decision based on fear of lack…lack of time, lack of patience, money or love. I know God supplies everyone with infinite good, an idea that was reinforced in our lives by Tamlin and Pippi. So, we gathered up two small pet taxis and headed to a pet adoption center which we had previously visited. It seemed pretty certain that we’d be coming home with at least one cat, maybe two. As we were leaving our house, I prayed part of the Lord’s prayer, “Thy will be done,” and trustingly left the outcome of our journey in God’s hands.
It didn’t take us long to pick out two darling kittens and complete the paperwork for adoption. Everything seemed to be going smoothly when the manager unexpectedly pulled my husband and me aside. The teenage girl who had showed us available cats and kittens on our previous visit had questioned whether Heidi and Lincoln (at the time vivacious 10 and 6-year olds) were calm and careful enough to have kittens, and the owner wasn’t sure about how grown cats would fit in with our dogs. While we didn’t necessarily agree with his reasoning, we left catless accompanied by a torrent of tears and objections from the kids.
As I prayed about Heidi'a and Lincoln’s disappointment, I refused to believe that God would allow our family to be deprived of anything good. I also made an effort to look for and appreciate all the good qualities (the love, gentleness, calmness) already being expressed by each family member. A few weeks later, our daughter saw an ad on a bulletin board at school for two grown cats. The cats were used to dogs and kids and were free to a good home. We adopted Toya and Piko, and within a few days they were perfectly settled into our family.
A favorite hymn says, "(God) knows the angels that you need, and sends them to your side, to comfort, guard and guide." We definitiely have angels living at our house, but they don’t have wings and halos. They have fur and long tails and their “Hallelujahs” sound more like “woofs” or “meows.” I call them angels because the stories of how they joined our family and their unending affection have taught me so much about God’s love and continually remind me of His ever-present guidance, and care.
Thanks for letting me share a few more pet stories!
Hugs,
Maria
Postscripts: I love in the Bible how a "great fish" had a key role to play in helping Jonah learn that God's plan can't be stopped, and Baalam's donkey wouldn't walk past the angel sent to keep Baalam from cursing Balak's enemies (see Numbers 22).
I've been reminded this week that if something is right, nothing can stop it from happening. Likewise if something isn't right (if God has a better plan), God won't let us make a mistake.
Several years ago, we adopted two collies. Tamlin, was named for a mythical Scottish knight. His handsome black coat and doting manner matched his namesake. Pippi, is light brown and white with black highlights; she could audition for Lassie. Her perkiness matches Pippi Long Stocking, the storybook character for which she is named. We got the dogs from a breeder who lives 11 hours away; gratefully she agreed to drive and meet us part way with the dogs. She is a musician with a busy performance schedule, but we managed to find one day in December which would work for both of our calendars. The day before we were to leave to get the dogs, there was still a lot to do. We were having trouble finding two dog crates that would sit side by side in the back of our car for the dogs to travel in. My dear mom, who had an absolute faith in God to take care of every single one of life’s details, spent the day praying for our trip. Late that night she called to say she wasn’t feeling well and asked if I could come to her house. As I cared for her throughout the night, she assured me that she wanted us to proceed with plans to get the dogs and suggested several options for her care; however, as morning dawned she unexpectedly passed away. As I prayed about what to do, the thought came to me very clearly that “Mom would want us to go get the dogs.” At first this seemed impossible, but I remembered Mom’s prayers. Trusting God to guide us step by step, we were able to make the necessary immediate arrangements for Mom’s affairs, found crates that fit in the car , and left for our trip late in the afternoon. Welcoming the dogs to our family, loving them and helping them get settled, was the perfect balm for healing grief over Mom’s passing. God's timing was perfect--a precious reminder that nothing, not even death, can separate us from the love of God.
The following fall, our children decided it was time to have cats again too. I wasn’t too sure about the idea (especially their request for kittens), but I try never to make a decision based on fear of lack…lack of time, lack of patience, money or love. I know God supplies everyone with infinite good, an idea that was reinforced in our lives by Tamlin and Pippi. So, we gathered up two small pet taxis and headed to a pet adoption center which we had previously visited. It seemed pretty certain that we’d be coming home with at least one cat, maybe two. As we were leaving our house, I prayed part of the Lord’s prayer, “Thy will be done,” and trustingly left the outcome of our journey in God’s hands.
It didn’t take us long to pick out two darling kittens and complete the paperwork for adoption. Everything seemed to be going smoothly when the manager unexpectedly pulled my husband and me aside. The teenage girl who had showed us available cats and kittens on our previous visit had questioned whether Heidi and Lincoln (at the time vivacious 10 and 6-year olds) were calm and careful enough to have kittens, and the owner wasn’t sure about how grown cats would fit in with our dogs. While we didn’t necessarily agree with his reasoning, we left catless accompanied by a torrent of tears and objections from the kids.
As I prayed about Heidi'a and Lincoln’s disappointment, I refused to believe that God would allow our family to be deprived of anything good. I also made an effort to look for and appreciate all the good qualities (the love, gentleness, calmness) already being expressed by each family member. A few weeks later, our daughter saw an ad on a bulletin board at school for two grown cats. The cats were used to dogs and kids and were free to a good home. We adopted Toya and Piko, and within a few days they were perfectly settled into our family.
A favorite hymn says, "(God) knows the angels that you need, and sends them to your side, to comfort, guard and guide." We definitiely have angels living at our house, but they don’t have wings and halos. They have fur and long tails and their “Hallelujahs” sound more like “woofs” or “meows.” I call them angels because the stories of how they joined our family and their unending affection have taught me so much about God’s love and continually remind me of His ever-present guidance, and care.
Thanks for letting me share a few more pet stories!
Hugs,
Maria
Postscripts: I love in the Bible how a "great fish" had a key role to play in helping Jonah learn that God's plan can't be stopped, and Baalam's donkey wouldn't walk past the angel sent to keep Baalam from cursing Balak's enemies (see Numbers 22).
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Bows of Promise
Dear Friend,
Happy May! May is one of my favorite months. It begins with my birthday on the 3rd and ends with the start of summer! For me, May also has often been a time of wonderful spiritual adventures.
Do you remember when we got our golden retriever Bogie? A week before my birthday, he came for a trial visit. Tamlin, who felt more like a soulmate than a pet, had passed away in January, and our other collie Pippi was lonely. Finding a new companion for her seemed like the right thing to do. Bogie’s family had moved into a condo, and he needed a new home. He quickly settled into our household routine; the kids and Pippi loved him, but my heart just wasn’t ready for another dog. The answer to my prayers for peace and direction came from a poem by Mary Baker Eddy (MBE),--“a bow of promise on the cloud.” Heidi had been calling the dog Bo. I realized I could love Bogie even though there were still clouds of doubt and moments when sadness thundered in my heart about Tamlin. Bogie’s joyful, loving presence was a promise that the storm would clear. My best birthday present that year was the call we made officially adopting Bogie.
The sun truly came out for me a few weeks later. Heidi (then in 6th grade) and I had tickets to a concert by one of her favorite singers, Jesse McCartney. I had been struggling with pain throughout my head and body for months, and I woke up the day of the concert feeling especially ill. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make it to work, let alone the concert. When we left for school that morning, Heidi was prepared for the possibility that Dad might have to take her to the concert, but that would mean leaving and getting in line over an hour (and several hundred people) later. I called a Christian Science practitioner to help me pray about the pain. Heidi prayed for me all day too. What a great team! By early afternoon, I was still uncomfortable but felt able to go. Heidi and I got to the theater about 4:30, sat down, and waited in line for the doors to open.
As I sat praying and appreciating the people around me, a heavy sense of responsibility lifted from my heart. I realized that I was not responsible for Tamlin’s life, not responsible for my children's happiness and health (nor for my own), not responsible for making sure I'm lovable or that my life is purposeful. That's God's job. Another line from the writings of MBE came to thought, “The divine Mind maintains all identities, from a blade of grass to a star, as distinct and eternal.” I realized that God maintains the continuity of Tamlin’s, my own, and all being. Thinking of Star Trek, I got the image of the molecules representing Tamlin as having been "beamed up" and now being perfectly manifested somewhere else.
The theater opened at 6:30, about an hour before the concert. As I sat off to the side for the next three hours with Heidi completely out of sight standing shoulder to shoulder on the main floor among 1,000 screaming teenagers, I was really grateful to know that I wasn't responsible for her safety--God was. I felt and enjoyed a God-given purpose to spiritually embrace everyone there with kindess. The mom sitting next to me was concerned about one of the girls she had brought on crutches, and I was able to assure her that God was there with the girls. I got to mother those around me--saving seats, picking-up dropped light sticks, letting a little girl stand on my stool so she could see. That night God’s presence became so much more real to me than the discomfort I had been feeling. GOD WAS SO THERE! His voice became louder than a screaming body and screaming girls. I really enjoyed the concert. It was Jesse McCartney's Beautiful Soul Tour. Looking around and appreciating my own and everyone's beautiful expression of Soul (God) was amazing.
I feel like God gave me a double rainbow that night. The lingering clouds about Tamlin lifted. It also was the beginning of a quick end to the pain that had been part of my experience in varying degrees for over a year and a half. There were many lessons learned and insights gained along the way, many milestones pointing towards the final healing of discomfort, but I’ll never forget the pivotal peace and inspiration of God's thereness that particular night at the concert.
I have high hopes for this being another amazing May. I have my eyes open for Life’s rainbows. (I've already found a few.) My birthday was great! Heidi’s class came to my office and sang “Happy Birthday” in Spanish. I got some great cards and lovely gifts. We brought in dinner from Trader Joe’s and enjoyed a nice, quiet evening at home. I feel really blessed.
Thanks for letting me share some May memories with you!
Lots of love,
Maria
Postscipts: The amazing feeling of “God being so there” stayed with me beyond the concert. A few days later, Lincoln wasn’t feeling well, and I turned to the “Scientific Statement of Being” written by MBE (see "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" page 468--I've also added it as a comment to this blog). I didn’t need to go any farther than the first word, “There.” God's thereness filled my consciousness. I knew God is all there could be anywhere, and already right there where sickness seemed to be. Lincoln was fine in less time than it has taken me to write this postscript. I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed a simpler, quicker healing.
Happy May! May is one of my favorite months. It begins with my birthday on the 3rd and ends with the start of summer! For me, May also has often been a time of wonderful spiritual adventures.
Do you remember when we got our golden retriever Bogie? A week before my birthday, he came for a trial visit. Tamlin, who felt more like a soulmate than a pet, had passed away in January, and our other collie Pippi was lonely. Finding a new companion for her seemed like the right thing to do. Bogie’s family had moved into a condo, and he needed a new home. He quickly settled into our household routine; the kids and Pippi loved him, but my heart just wasn’t ready for another dog. The answer to my prayers for peace and direction came from a poem by Mary Baker Eddy (MBE),--“a bow of promise on the cloud.” Heidi had been calling the dog Bo. I realized I could love Bogie even though there were still clouds of doubt and moments when sadness thundered in my heart about Tamlin. Bogie’s joyful, loving presence was a promise that the storm would clear. My best birthday present that year was the call we made officially adopting Bogie.
The sun truly came out for me a few weeks later. Heidi (then in 6th grade) and I had tickets to a concert by one of her favorite singers, Jesse McCartney. I had been struggling with pain throughout my head and body for months, and I woke up the day of the concert feeling especially ill. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make it to work, let alone the concert. When we left for school that morning, Heidi was prepared for the possibility that Dad might have to take her to the concert, but that would mean leaving and getting in line over an hour (and several hundred people) later. I called a Christian Science practitioner to help me pray about the pain. Heidi prayed for me all day too. What a great team! By early afternoon, I was still uncomfortable but felt able to go. Heidi and I got to the theater about 4:30, sat down, and waited in line for the doors to open.
As I sat praying and appreciating the people around me, a heavy sense of responsibility lifted from my heart. I realized that I was not responsible for Tamlin’s life, not responsible for my children's happiness and health (nor for my own), not responsible for making sure I'm lovable or that my life is purposeful. That's God's job. Another line from the writings of MBE came to thought, “The divine Mind maintains all identities, from a blade of grass to a star, as distinct and eternal.” I realized that God maintains the continuity of Tamlin’s, my own, and all being. Thinking of Star Trek, I got the image of the molecules representing Tamlin as having been "beamed up" and now being perfectly manifested somewhere else.
The theater opened at 6:30, about an hour before the concert. As I sat off to the side for the next three hours with Heidi completely out of sight standing shoulder to shoulder on the main floor among 1,000 screaming teenagers, I was really grateful to know that I wasn't responsible for her safety--God was. I felt and enjoyed a God-given purpose to spiritually embrace everyone there with kindess. The mom sitting next to me was concerned about one of the girls she had brought on crutches, and I was able to assure her that God was there with the girls. I got to mother those around me--saving seats, picking-up dropped light sticks, letting a little girl stand on my stool so she could see. That night God’s presence became so much more real to me than the discomfort I had been feeling. GOD WAS SO THERE! His voice became louder than a screaming body and screaming girls. I really enjoyed the concert. It was Jesse McCartney's Beautiful Soul Tour. Looking around and appreciating my own and everyone's beautiful expression of Soul (God) was amazing.
I feel like God gave me a double rainbow that night. The lingering clouds about Tamlin lifted. It also was the beginning of a quick end to the pain that had been part of my experience in varying degrees for over a year and a half. There were many lessons learned and insights gained along the way, many milestones pointing towards the final healing of discomfort, but I’ll never forget the pivotal peace and inspiration of God's thereness that particular night at the concert.
I have high hopes for this being another amazing May. I have my eyes open for Life’s rainbows. (I've already found a few.) My birthday was great! Heidi’s class came to my office and sang “Happy Birthday” in Spanish. I got some great cards and lovely gifts. We brought in dinner from Trader Joe’s and enjoyed a nice, quiet evening at home. I feel really blessed.
Thanks for letting me share some May memories with you!
Lots of love,
Maria
Postscipts: The amazing feeling of “God being so there” stayed with me beyond the concert. A few days later, Lincoln wasn’t feeling well, and I turned to the “Scientific Statement of Being” written by MBE (see "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" page 468--I've also added it as a comment to this blog). I didn’t need to go any farther than the first word, “There.” God's thereness filled my consciousness. I knew God is all there could be anywhere, and already right there where sickness seemed to be. Lincoln was fine in less time than it has taken me to write this postscript. I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed a simpler, quicker healing.
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