Costa Rica Lessons - Sharing Spirituality

Mike recently gave a presentation at church about sharing our spiritual journeys. As part of the gathering, he asked me to talk about how I became more comfortable talking about spirituality with others while we were in Costa Rica. A slightly modified version of what I shared follows:

Mike has always been good about engaging in conversation with others, but I’ve tended to be much more hesitant in talking about my thoughts and feelings outside of a very small circle of family and friends, and even then I’ve often done better communicating through writing than talking face to face. For the most part, I have lived a pretty sheltered life surrounded by other Christian Scientists. So, interacting with people in Costa Rica whose faith practices are so different from my own was a good stretch for me.

Every week Mike held “Prayer and Share” meetings at Rio Shanti, a colorful house turned into a yoga studio and boutique. Rio Shanti means, “River of Peace,” and it is one of my favorite places in Monteverde…one of my favorite places anywhere.

One of the first things I did at Rio Shanti was attend an I-Ching circle. I had no idea what an I-Ching circle was, but it was free and a way to meet other people who spoke English. I soon learned that I-Ching is one of the oldest wisdom teachings. We’d sit in a circle, individually think of a question or challenge in our lives, and then draw an I-Ching card (kind of like someone might open the Bible to a random verse when looking for an answer). We’d each read our card and talk together about how it applied to what we were thinking about. There was often wonderful synchronicity. The card I drew in thinking about this presentation is an example: “#44 High Connections: Make connections that are good for you. Give the power to your higher nature and abide by the choice. Bring light and healing to all of you. Unite with the highest in others and the highest in your circumstances.” Theo, the creator of the cards, was a great facilitator. He always seemed to know when I had something to say but was being hesitant. Through these circles, I began to develop the confidence to talk about my thoughts and things that are important to me spiritually. For many of the participants, the discussion had little to do with religious faith. But God is very much a part of how I think, and eventually, when talking about my own experience, I found that I was able to bring God into the conversation in a way that felt very natural and that people respected and appreciated.

At Rio Shanti, I also enjoyed attending “Peace Pilgrim” discussions, a few mediation sessions, my first yoga classes, an “Inner Peace” circle, and a presentation on Ken Wilber’s “Integral Philosophy.” I may not have learned much Spanish in Costa Rica, but I did begin to broaden my knowledge of the language of contemporary spirituality. In the gentle, open atmosphere of Rio Shanti, I found the courage to step out of my comfort zone and try new things…including talking about and from my heart.

I have to confess that, as much as I liked any excuse to go to Rio Shanti, at first I wasn’t very supportive of Mike’s “Prayer and Share” meetings. I was learning to talk about God, but reading from the Bible and Science and Health and talking about spiritual healing was another story. I think I was afraid of turning off the new friends we were making. I didn’t want to be seen as pushy.

However, this began to change for me at one meeting where our friend Alberto talked about how cool it is that there are so many different religions and ways to worship God—structured services for those who like to know what’s coming, silent gatherings like Quaker Meetings, large contemporary services with rock bands and charismatic preachers, groups that share dancing, singing, meditation. There’s something for almost everyone. He also commented on how much God must enjoy being worshipped is so many different ways.

His thoughts made an impression on me. As I sat there looking at the beauty around me, I began comparing this diversity of worship to the amazing biodiversity in the Costa Rican rainforests and imaging God being just as delighted by the world’s diversity of religions and faith practices as we are by the diversity of wildlife—the hundreds of different orchids, insects, or birds found in the cloud forest.

I began to wonder, “If God loves all these different forms of worship, how can I say that my religion is better than another or is truly “the” way?” In nature, “absolute truth” for one animal (i.e. what it needs to not only survive but thrive) is very different from the needs or “absolute truth” of another. Is it same for us in our search to understand God? I began wondering if in our convictions about our own faith, we sometimes try to take fish out of water in relating to others. Had I been trying to “impart” my faith as salvation, rather than simply sharing it through my own story?

I can’t say that I have answers but realizing that my faith practices are just one example of God-blessed spiritual diversity (something to celebrate) has really helped set the tone for talking about my religious convictions with others. It has helped me be less judgmental and has also given me confidence in telling other Christian Scientists about some of the non-traditional things my own church is doing.

So if you’re uncomfortable talking about your thoughts and life (let alone your spirituality) with others, I encourage you to start simply. Invite a new friend to Starbucks and just talk about your family. Maybe join a book discussion group, or try sharing a thought or two at church services. Take a baby step. It might be the beginning of a wonderful journey.

Costa Rica Lessons - Experiencing Versus Accomplishing

(Today we will have been back from Costa Rica for a year, and I realized it has been even longer since I’ve written anything about our time there…partially because it has taken that long to distill some of the lessons learned, Hopefully, bit by bit, they’ll make their way onto the page. Someone recently asked why life seems slower-paced in many Latin American countries. Thinking about that question helped bring the following thoughts into focus. )

At the first gathering of international families at the Cloud Forest School (i.e. those of us from the USA), we were given packets to help orient us to the school and community. But perhaps the most useful information shared was a piece of advice, “Don’t expect too much. Be content if you only accomplish one thing each day.” Not an easy frame of mind to adopt for those of us who delight in crossings things off our “to do” lists. There were many luxuries we didn’t have--a car, hot water in the kitchen, reliable internet, or at first even a dryer. Yet, at that point, little did I imagine that this “one thing” would sometimes simply be having clean dry clothes for the next day or all the ingredients for the evening meal. At first, I don’t know which was harder, walking uphill for 25 minutes carrying a backpack of groceries, or accepting this feat as my major accomplishment for the day.

Things move more slowly in Costa Rica. “Tico time” (i.e. people being little late) isn’t a slur but a simple fact of life. And it could be argued that there aren’t as many things to do in Monteverde as in a big city. However, it occurs to me that what ultimately makes life feel simpler and slower paced there is an attitude. People seem to be much more interested in experiencing life than in getting places or accomplishing things. There is one main road that leads everywhere. Michael said that traveling down this road was his definition of being online in Monteverde. He was much more likely to connect with people he needed to talk to while walking somewhere than by trying to reach them by phone or email. For us, “Tico time” came to mean leaving early for activities so we’d have time to stop and talk to people along the way…or maybe pause awhile to admire a rainbow or watch some monkeys.

It took us awhile to adjust our paradigms and values to not measure a day by things accomplished. The saying, “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today” doesn’t totally ring true to me anymore, but rather, “Be willing to put off until tomorrow what you had planned to do today if circumstances or inspiration call you elsewhere. Be willing to let go of a sense of urgency about getting things done and enjoy the people who cross your path, pause to dig deeper into the inspirations that come, appreciate the beauty around you.”

I had an opportunity to bring this lesson home this winter and spring when Bogie, our golden retriever was ill. Because of health challenges, he wasn’t very mobile, so I spent many hours sitting by his side reading, thinking, praying, or simply playing card games on my computer. But had I not slowed down…postponing the house cleaning and dishes occasionally, leaving the laundry in the basket for yet another day, or choosing his company over going out and doing something else…I would have missed a lot. I might never have realized how courageous he was, how much joy and peace he radiated, how unbothered he was by what was going on with his body. I learned a lot from him during his last months with us; we both experienced a lot of life.

And that’s what I want to keep doing…experiencing life. Yes, sometimes we need to accomplish things, but I hope I remember to put first things first whenever possible…to take time to watch a sunset, pet a dog, enjoy my family and friends, or strike up a conversation with a stranger. This is, as they say in Costa Rica, “Pura vida!” (pure life).