Bows of Promise

Dear Friend,

Happy May! May is one of my favorite months. It begins with my birthday on the 3rd and ends with the start of summer! For me, May also has often been a time of wonderful spiritual adventures.

Do you remember when we got our golden retriever Bogie? A week before my birthday, he came for a trial visit. Tamlin, who felt more like a soulmate than a pet, had passed away in January, and our other collie Pippi was lonely. Finding a new companion for her seemed like the right thing to do. Bogie’s family had moved into a condo, and he needed a new home. He quickly settled into our household routine; the kids and Pippi loved him, but my heart just wasn’t ready for another dog. The answer to my prayers for peace and direction came from a poem by Mary Baker Eddy (MBE),--“a bow of promise on the cloud.” Heidi had been calling the dog Bo. I realized I could love Bogie even though there were still clouds of doubt and moments when sadness thundered in my heart about Tamlin. Bogie’s joyful, loving presence was a promise that the storm would clear. My best birthday present that year was the call we made officially adopting Bogie.

The sun truly came out for me a few weeks later. Heidi (then in 6th grade) and I had tickets to a concert by one of her favorite singers, Jesse McCartney. I had been struggling with pain throughout my head and body for months, and I woke up the day of the concert feeling especially ill. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make it to work, let alone the concert. When we left for school that morning, Heidi was prepared for the possibility that Dad might have to take her to the concert, but that would mean leaving and getting in line over an hour (and several hundred people) later. I called a Christian Science practitioner to help me pray about the pain. Heidi prayed for me all day too. What a great team! By early afternoon, I was still uncomfortable but felt able to go. Heidi and I got to the theater about 4:30, sat down, and waited in line for the doors to open.

As I sat praying and appreciating the people around me, a heavy sense of responsibility lifted from my heart. I realized that I was not responsible for Tamlin’s life, not responsible for my children's happiness and health (nor for my own), not responsible for making sure I'm lovable or that my life is purposeful. That's God's job. Another line from the writings of MBE came to thought, “The divine Mind maintains all identities, from a blade of grass to a star, as distinct and eternal.” I realized that God maintains the continuity of Tamlin’s, my own, and all being. Thinking of Star Trek, I got the image of the molecules representing Tamlin as having been "beamed up" and now being perfectly manifested somewhere else.

The theater opened at 6:30, about an hour before the concert. As I sat off to the side for the next three hours with Heidi completely out of sight standing shoulder to shoulder on the main floor among 1,000 screaming teenagers, I was really grateful to know that I wasn't responsible for her safety--God was. I felt and enjoyed a God-given purpose to spiritually embrace everyone there with kindess. The mom sitting next to me was concerned about one of the girls she had brought on crutches, and I was able to assure her that God was there with the girls. I got to mother those around me--saving seats, picking-up dropped light sticks, letting a little girl stand on my stool so she could see. That night God’s presence became so much more real to me than the discomfort I had been feeling. GOD WAS SO THERE! His voice became louder than a screaming body and screaming girls. I really enjoyed the concert. It was Jesse McCartney's Beautiful Soul Tour. Looking around and appreciating my own and everyone's beautiful expression of Soul (God) was amazing.

I feel like God gave me a double rainbow that night. The lingering clouds about Tamlin lifted. It also was the beginning of a quick end to the pain that had been part of my experience in varying degrees for over a year and a half. There were many lessons learned and insights gained along the way, many milestones pointing towards the final healing of discomfort, but I’ll never forget the pivotal peace and inspiration of God's thereness that particular night at the concert.

I have high hopes for this being another amazing May. I have my eyes open for Life’s rainbows. (I've already found a few.) My birthday was great! Heidi’s class came to my office and sang “Happy Birthday” in Spanish. I got some great cards and lovely gifts. We brought in dinner from Trader Joe’s and enjoyed a nice, quiet evening at home. I feel really blessed.

Thanks for letting me share some May memories with you!

Lots of love,
Maria

Postscipts: The amazing feeling of “God being so there” stayed with me beyond the concert. A few days later, Lincoln wasn’t feeling well, and I turned to the “Scientific Statement of Being” written by MBE (see "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" page 468--I've also added it as a comment to this blog). I didn’t need to go any farther than the first word, “There.” God's thereness filled my consciousness. I knew God is all there could be anywhere, and already right there where sickness seemed to be. Lincoln was fine in less time than it has taken me to write this postscript. I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed a simpler, quicker healing.