Don't go Judgin'!!

Heidi's final project for a recent religious studies class was to imagine what Paul would say if he visited her former school today. Her email from Paul based on I Corinthians follows. Enjoy! (By the way, her first week at Crossroads was "awesome.")

From: “Paul of Tarsus”
To: “Upper School Students”
Date: 2007 in the Year of Our Lord
Subject: Cool it with the gossiping! Don’t go judgin’!! Love everyone you meet, not just yo’ peeps!!

Hey!
Your friend Paul here. I’m sending you this message for a reason, so don’t delete it!! Read the whole thing so that God can reach out to you. He’s always been there, but you have to be the ones to make the effort to ‘friend’ him on Facebook and start up the communication. You guys have been pretty good about that – you try really hard to express God, and Jesus is obviously sticking with you all. I think you know what you’re doing, and all you want is good. Never forget that Jesus and God are right there for you!

On the other hand though, you’ve got some serious issues. I’m not trying to diss you, but this is important! You need to pull yourselves together!! Friends have texted me, and what they say isn’t good. They said since I left, you’ve been gossiping about each other, gettin’ up in each others grillz. You’ve been very judgmental about people you should be friends with, and even laughing at them because of what they look like, who they’re dating, or what ideas they have about the world! That is not cool!! Pull yourselves together!!!

Trust me, I’ve had friends backstab me too, and I know how much it stings. When my close friend and traveling companion John Mark left me during an important time in my journeys because he doubted that my plan to spread Christianity would work, I was seriously ticked, and very depressed. That doesn’t mean I wanted to spread false stories about him for revenge or stop loving him like a brother! What you all need to learn to do is learn to forgive and forget! No one can be perfect, and when people make mistakes or do things that hurt you, get over it! Ultimately, you are both children of God, and if you don’t love your friends, you don’t have anything. Without true love for even your closest friends, no matter how much they mess up, how can you begin to love everyone??

That’s the other thing you guys need to get up to scratch on: stop judging people!!! Not everyone at your school is the same, and that’s great, but you need to spread the love to everyone, not just the people you agree with, ones who dress like you, or hang out with you. Even if you read your Bible Lesson every day, believe in God with all your heart, and say your prayers and sing hymns every night before you go to bed, but can’t love people without conditions, you have absolutely nothing, and your faith is wasted. Take my views on requirements for becoming a Christian, for example. Most converted Pharisees, (and I used to be one too), thought that to become a Christian, you had to become a Jew first, and follow Jewish customs, like being circumcised, but I stopped them in their tracks. Christianity (and keep in mind as I say this that you are a Christian school) is all about love. Jesus loved the world so much that he died on the cross then rose himself from the dead to prove his love. Love shouldn’t have any conditions whatsoever. It is an unselfish, pure thing that everyone should share freely with everyone else, no matter what their background, opinions, appearance, or what they’ve done in the past.

In short, Love is all you’ve got, friends. Without it, there’s nothing important you can do. It needs to become your top priority, over any personal thoughts you might have about others. Just love them!

I may come visit you again soon, so be on the lookout. Send my greetings to the good teachers of your community, and remember to spread the love! I love you all in the name of Jesus, dudes. Peace out!

-Paul

May You Flourish

Dear Heidi,

Monday is my father’s birthday. If he were still on earth, he would be 95. It somehow seems fitting that Monday is also the day you begin at your new school. If you have any of my dad’s genes, I think they include his liberal outlook. I know he would really like who you are.

Dad was born into a Republican family, but switched parties. He used to smile on Election Day and talk about how he and his brothers would go to the polls and cancel their parents’ votes; but because there were three boys, the Democrats always claimed a victory in the Stocking household. Dad voted a straight party ticket, voting not for people but for a system of values. He made sure I had a working knowledge of US government from an early age—the branches of government and balance of power as well as both parties’ ideals and politics.

Dad would love the diversity of students at Crossroads School. He taught at Cooley High School in Detroit during the race riots. He would often tell of the day he was healed of lingering racial prejudice. A favorite student learned that he was a Christian Scientist and invited Dad to meet his grandfather, a Christian Science practitioner. When Dad met the gentleman, he was taken aback by the man’s deep black skin. Only then did Dad look at his lighter-skinned student and began to notice some of the boy’s African-American features. In their conversation, the man told Dad that, although he was a Christian Science practitioner, he wasn’t listed in our Journal’s directory of practitioners because he didn’t want the word “colored” to appear after his name. This boy and his grandfather forever changed how my dad looked at mankind. Dad’s special interest as a social studies teacher became black history. He collected quite a library of books to share with his students and colleagues. In our home, we celebrated Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday for years before it became a national holiday. King’s “I have a dream” is a sound bite permanently etched into my memory.

Dad would also like Crossroads’ efforts to be a green campus. When I was in elementary school in the 70’s, we used to walk a few blocks up the street to an alternative sources of energy store and help put labels on mailings. It was as much a headquarters for environmental activists as it was a shop. I laugh now to think of what an unlikely location it was—a busy street corner in the middle of Detroit. Yet there you could find electricity generated by the wind, feel toasty in a building heated by solar panels, and join pioneers as they sipped sun tea and discussed the latest issue of “Mother Earth News.” Dad would admire your desires and efforts to make a difference in the world.

I hope that while you are at Crossroads you will take many different electives. Dad’s brother Uncle Fred is a self-proclaimed dabbler. When he retired from being a college English teacher, he took up painting and playing the recorder. At the age of 84, his wife Carol gave her first vocal recital. I admire Stocking family members for not being afraid to try new things. Uncle Fred happens to be pretty good at his hobbies, but perfection isn’t a goal. His joy is in the process, the sheer joy of trying and doing. My dad’s favorite hobby was ham radio. He talked in Morse code to people all over the world. He built his own equipment, taught adult education classes to help people get ham radio licenses, and wrote articles on antenna design for “73 Magazine.” He and his friends talked over the radio waves in Morse code long before “chat rooms” became a household word. But Dad also loved gardening and playing the piano. At different times in his life, he dabbled in painting, model airplanes and photography. He built is own photo-processing equipment and a dark room in the basement. Occasionally as a child I got to help him carefully move photos from one developing tray to the next. I have happy memories of sharing in his projects.

I will think of my mom and dad as I drive you to and from Crossroads. Dad was born and raised in Detroit, but just before I entered 7th grade, he left his home and moved to Missouri for my education. He and Mom wanted me to go to school in an environment where they felt I could best flourish. For the same reason your dad and I look towards your next adventure with hearts filled with hope. We are excited about the opportunities you will have at Crossroads to learn, to meet new people, to give and to love.

Have fun on Monday! Take my Dad’s twinkle in your eyes to school; and maybe when you get home, we can celebrate in Dad’s favorite way. Ice cream anyone?

I love you,
Mom

"The Law of Kindness"

Dear Jeff,

Just over a week ago, I was busy putting the finishing touches on packing the family for our various camping experiences. Mike and Lincoln were preparing to head south to one camp and Heidi and I west to another. Suitcases, duffle bags, and backpacks lined the living room waiting to be put into cars, but mentally I was far from ready to go. I was so tired physically and emotionally that the drive to camp seemed as daunting as the thought of peaking one of the 14,000 foot mountains surrounding camp. I knew Heidi would be a good traveling companion, but she couldn’t help with the actual driving; and she was so excited about camp I could tell it would be hard to keep pace with her happy chatter. I realized that I had to humbly put the trip in God’s hands and asked a friend to help me pray about the drive.

I should know by now that when I let go of fear and completely trust God, amazing things happen. However, you took me completely by surprise when you told me you’d bought a one-way plane ticket back from camp so that you could drive out with me. True you’d get to see your wife—the love of your life who just also happened to be at camp, but only for one short night. The main reason you were making the trip was out of a deep love for my family, a brotherly “being there for you.” What a weight you lifted off my shoulders! When I went to bed that night I was exhausted, yet filled with hope. I’m not an early riser. For me getting out of bed before 7 am is early, but I awoke at 4:40 the next morning without the alarm clock, awake and ready to go. As we drove, the miles and hours flew by. I loved having someone to share the driving with, having you join me in appreciating Heidi’s exuberance, talking about life and listening to all the CDs you brought along—wonderful artists I’d never heard before.

Not a day has passed when I haven’t thought of your kindness. It has been a beacon of Love helping me settle in and find my niche at camp, helping melt away the concerns that seemed so burdensome before our trip, and giving me such tangible proof of God's care to draw upon.

Yet for days I’ve sensed that there was more to this story—a bigger lesson for me to learn. I was so struck by your kindness. My family has individually and collectively received very unselfish and generous gifts before, so I’ve wondered why this gift has left me somewhat speechless, why it has taken me so many attempts to write this letter. Last night I thought of Mary anointing Jesus’ feet with expensive ointment. Judas suggested that Mary should have sold the ointment instead and given the money to the poor. Jesus replied, “Let her alone: against the day of my burying hath she kept this. For the poor always ye have with you; but me ye have not always had." (John 12) Suddenly I glimpsed how much Mary’s expression of love must have meant to Jesus, helping strengthen him for the crucifixion. Even Jesus needed human expressions of kindness!

A hymn in the Christian Science hymnal (#178) says, “Jesus knew the law of kindness, healing mind and heart of blindness….” I probably could have “demonstrated” the drive out alone. There have been many times in my life when moment by moment reliance on God has pulled me through fatigue and other difficulties, but one more proof of this type wasn’t my true need. I needed to feel the effects of God’s law of kindness. My heart was unknowingly so hungry for it. I’ve had the opportunity to give significant gifts and enjoyed the satisfaction that comes from helping meet someone’s need, but now I understand in a much deeper way what it feels like to be the receiver---the warmth in the heart, the awe at the power of Love. There was something so pure, so intuitive, so timely about your gift. I too want to practice the law of kindness that heals, to give gifts both practical and prayerful that are so imbued with love that their healing balm sends ripples into the universe.

By the way, yesterday Heidi and 17 fellow campers peaked Mount Columbia—one of Colorado’s amazing 14,000 foot peaks. Although usually not very athletic, she knew she’d be able to do it with the help of her friends, with the oil of kindness.

Mike and I both are so grateful for your friendship. Thank you for being an exemplary Mary.

With love,

Maria

Inspired and Inspiring

Hello World,

My fourteen year-old daughter Heidi is an inspiration to me. She is moulding who I am as much as my mothering may influence her (if not more so). It is I who have followed her lead on becoming a vegetarian, in making fashion choices, in being more forgiving. She thinks deeply and spiritually. So, look out! She is going to change the world. In some ways she already has.

Heidi recently submitted an article to the Christian Science Publishing Society. Since they decided not to print it, I have her permission to post it here. Enjoy!

With love,
Maria

Pen One With Love, Despite Writer’s Block
by Heidi

I recently had an assignment to write an inspirational article. Two days before it was due, I had part of the article written, but my heart was not in the writing and the whole thing seemed extremely superficial. For days I had put off working on it, feeling a stubborn sense of writer’s block, and once or twice crying because I didn’t know how to make the article feel “real.” My mom finally said that if I didn’t finish the article, I couldn’t go to Six Flags with my friends the next day.

I was desperate for everything to work out, but I didn’t know what or how to do it. I wanted so badly for this article to be perfect, for people to see it and think, "Wow, that is really good." I wanted the others in the group to be impressed by me.

I was crying in confusion again about the article and what I was going to do--how it all had to be perfect. My mom had me call a Christian Science practitioner, and while she gave me some ideas and agreed to pray for me about the article, I hung up the phone feeling even more hopeless. Now there was yet another person I would disappoint if this wasn’t an amazing article.

At this point, I was quite hysterical. I sat in front of the blank computer screen screaming at God to help me. I was trying to calm myself, but I only felt helplessness. I kept yelling prayers that I have learned from Sunday School, but I have said them so many times that they felt almost meaningless.

I was shaking uncontrollably when my golden retriever, Bogie, walked in the door wagging his tail. I collapsed onto him, clinging onto his fur with all my might. For a few minutes I just sobbed into his warm coat, as he stood there patiently, with a calm peace almost uncharacteristic for him.

I felt God in Bogie just then. I felt that all really was well, and no matter what I wrote for the article it wouldn’t matter what people thought. "If Love is at all present, it is all that is present," is another thought that ran through my head, and I had to smile at how true that was. Bogie was expressing so much joy and comfort. I felt so much love and gratitude in that moment. Bogie knew that Love was here. It occurred to me that I could just love what I have to write, too.

I remembered a quick healing of food poisoning I had when the same practitioner asked me, “How do you feel about Bogie?” I had responded by telling her how much I loved him. She said something along the lines of, “So you feel good about him. If you can feel that goodness and you can feel that love for Bogie, then that is all you can feel and know in every other aspect of your life. God good does not pick and choose where goodness and love are going to be. The all-knowing only knows how to be All-in-all, not All-in-some (part of your life) or Part (of God) in-all. But All-in-all. Since there is only one measure of God, good.... and that is infinite, allness, if God is at all present in your life, He is all-present.” This thought came to my mind again as I buried my head in Bogie’s chest. I knew that God had a plan and it was going to work out.

A sudden wave of joy and peace came over me, and I started yelling again, only this time it was, “Thank you, thank you God.” I had an answer. It didn’t matter if I didn’t know what I was going to write just yet. Nothing had to be humanly perfect. I didn’t need to fear. God really did speak to me then. In that instant, I felt completely healed of any anxiety I had regarding the project, and of any sense of hysteria. Suddenly, I knew what I wanted to write about; I felt it and I loved it. Bogie licked me one more time, then walked out of the room, still wagging his tail. His work was done.

With that new sense of peace, gratitude and excitement that I had all I needed, that God really had spoken to me and it was not superficial in any way, I began to write. I felt God’s presence more than I had in a long, long time. When I was done with the article, I knew it was not perfect, but that was ok. The true thought behind it and the love I felt would show through, and that was all that mattered. I didn’t need to worry about being judged; I felt good about what God had led me to write, and so wonderfully at peace about the whole situation.

That love, peace, and inspiration from God and through Bogie has been such a blessing and turning point for me. Thank you Bogie, and thank you God.